Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Through My Prayers

A consummate Avett Brothers fan (my blog title should be a dead giveaway), I ordered an advance copy of "The Carpenter" and have been playing the album in my headphones to and from the office every day for the past week. I've discovered that the mellow quality of the songs offsets the frenetic New York City commute quite nicely.

Of course, there's a difference between hearing and listening. I've heard the entire album many times, but little by little, I've been listening to each song. This morning, I actually listened to "Through My Prayers," and it left me a big, emotional mess in the Carroll Street station waiting for the F train.

It made my heart hurt, but in a good way.

Hard to believe I won't see you again
We were just fighting when winter began
The coldness of our words competing with the wind from the north.
Still they make me shiver, but in a very different way
The pages of the calendar kept turning away
I have some better words now, but it's too late to say them to you.
My dream of all dreams and my hope of all hopes
Is only to tell you and make sure you know
How much I love you and how much I always did.
And yes I know you love me, I can see it in your eyes
And it was in your struggle and it was in your mind
And it was in the smile you gave me when I was a kid.
Feels like no one understands
And now my only chance
To talk to you is through my prayers
I only wanted to tell you I care.

Every night after and every day since
I found myself crying when the memory hit
Sometimes it knocks me down, sometimes I can just put it away.
Down in my mind where I don't care to go
The pain of a lesson is letting me know
If you have love in your heart, let it show while you can.
Yes, now I understand
But now my only chance
To talk to you is through my prayers
I only wanted to tell you I care
I only wanted to tell you I care.
(Avett Brothers, Through My Prayers)

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